BYBS: Ice Cream!

And now, a word from our sponsor :-)

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In keeping with talking about the positive aspects of mundane life, one thing that has been good for me is Ice Cream.

OK, so it has also contributed to "expanding my horizons" (e.g., becoming fat), it has also been a very nice thing to eat from time to time. Your body needs energy to keep going, and ice cream (in particular, vanilla, with some hot fudge and whipped cream) is a nice way of getting it.

I have also found ice cream to be an excellent way of winning friends and influencing people. Erstwhile enemies or those that I might not get along with otherwise have been won over by the charming nature of a banana split. Having to deal with me is small potatoes compared to it.

As an example, I remember one time as a wee lad that I had just seen a movie with a bunch of other kids. We stopped along the way back from the theater to get some refreshments. As the picture of moderation in life, I ordered the grand, humongous, super-sized ice cream sundae. As it was delivered to me, all eyes swiveled towards me (or rather the sundae) in obvious envy and hunger. With a smile I said "Would anyone like some?"

The group descended on my poor sundae like a pack of wolves. When they were done, I had a portion roughly the same size as everyone else (at which I was a little miffed). On the other hand, the smile on the other kid's faces was nice, and for someone who tends to see the negative aspects of his past, it's a good memory.

Also, it had fewer calories.

Have a good rest of the Sundae…er…Sunday :-)

Technorati: Banana Split, ice cream, sundae

BYBS: Reflection

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Taking a second to reflect on things, I realize that being able to reflect on things is a blessing.

I'm not talking about the act of thinking about what happened in the past, what I'm referring to is more about being in a frame of mind that is conducive to reflection, having the time to do so, etc. On those rare occasions where such things come together, it is a good moment.

A friend of mine talked about trying to view life as a sort of bead necklace, with good moments making up the individual beads. Certainly for me this is a good metaphor, since it seems like string in between is usually rough, perhaps mixed in with glass. So a moment of reflection is a bead on the string of life for me.

Tags: BYBS, Reflection, Bead, Necklace

BYBS: Cobalt Sky

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So I was sitting in my miserable cube, writing code that would be considered unusually crude if it had been produced by a colony of cherrystone clams when a couple of coworkers mentioned that they were going for a walk and would I like to come. In the interests of helping out one of them, who is about my height and yet over double my weight, I went along.

As we schlepped around under the glare of a strange, fiery orb whose light I was unused to I realized that this was the first time I had been outside in ages. This winter, with its unmelting snow, relentless stress, and stubborn viruses had been draining my soul.

Then I realized something else that was odd: I was staring at the ground. This was partially because some Canadian geese had demonstrated healthy bowel functioning on the sidewalks, but it was also because somehow that's where my eyes were drawn.

With a conscious effort, I managed to look up and around at the surrounding area and noticed the beautiful day. It was a very clear day and sky was a beautiful cobalt blue. I realized that I had been spending a lot of time like that lately: staring down at the ground and the goose shit instead of being able to see everything else that was going on.

In a short time I was back in my dark cube, doing my usual, boring crap, but the beautiful vision from that walk stayed with me.

Tags: BYBS, geese, cobalt sky

Hindsight

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Last week I did the volunteer thing again. For inquiring minds, this was basically helping serve food to people.

The last time I did this I was a bit dismayed by my lack of feeling while doing this. This time…I also did not feel a whole lot while working there. That was mostly because I was very busy the whole time trying to put green beans onto a try. It turns out that I'm not very good at doing that.

A friend I was there with remarked that it felt better than the last time: the last time he was basically ensuring that people came in a little at a time instead of all at once. He was right in that it certainly felt like I had done more: we were working behind the counter, putting food on trays. It was hot and I was rushed the whole time because it seemed like they were constantly waiting for me. I think this was mostly because I was so damn slow with the green beans.

While I definitely felt like I had done some work, in some ways it was worse than before: I was so busy putting food on trays that I could not look up at the people we were serving. This time, I only knew about them when someone would ask for vegetables only. Fortunately, the supply of green beans held out for the night.

The next day, however, I realized that everyone who had been there had helped so that we could serve more people. Without someone to limit the number of people coming in, we would have been thronged and nobody would have been able to sit down to eat. With someone to hand out trays, we were able to get more people through. And with someone putting green beans on a try, you could get more trays of food to people.

Yes, I was very replaceable in the whole thing: just about anyone can put food on a tray. But I was there and other people were not. If I had not been there, they would have served fewer people.

I remember seeing a video about the marines where the soldiers had been encouraged to relinquish a part of their identity by referring to themselves as "this marine" or "this soldier." At the time I had found the notion a bit disturbing. It sounded a bit too mindless for people who might have to make difficult moral decisions in very unforgiving situations.

The person who had suggested that people perform community service talked about it as "the giving of self." I had thought of this more as me giving time to help out. Giving time is like giving a part of your life. I had not thought of it as giving a part of my identity, but while I was working there, I was pretty much a mindless, green bean serving machine. I later realized that is was more of giving up myself to help with the work, if only for a little while.

Like the people in the video I had seen, to help, I really had to submerge my ego for a time and become part of a whole. I'm not sure if that's what the person who had suggested this meant, but afterwards I felt like I had been part of a community.

Tags: community, serve, ego, group, homeless, giving of self.

Vitamin I

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For those that don't hike, "Vitamin I" is an alias for Ibuprofen: an aspirin substitute. It is especially good at dealing with pain. At the moment I have been immobilized by a nasty, pain inducing cold style of thing. Hence this is a very short, past-due posting. Argh. Tags: Ibuprofen, pain, argh.

BYBS: those that Sacrifice

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Soldiers, police, fire fighters, coast guard, etc. These people do jobs that I cannot or will not do; and part of those jobs involves risking their lives. That's an unbelievable gift for one person to give to another. Then consider that these people may not know or even like the people they are protecting and it becomes even more mind-boggling.

Such people are paid for their work, but it seems to me that whatever compensation they receive for their work, it is not equivalent to the risks they take. Furthermore, I don't always agree to the uses that they are put to: Iraq is a prime example of this for me. Never the less, and especially in the case of soldiers, they are not afforded the luxury of choice. They sacrifice part of their freedom when they choose to serve.

Like any group of human beings, there are some who work against their society. Police scandals, the abuses at Abu Grave, etc. all show that this is not only possible, but happening. It is my belief (nothing on hand to back this up) that these are the minority.

My thanks go out to those that risk their lives on behalf of others: I regard it as a blessing.

Tags: soldiers, police, fire-fighters, bybs, sacrifice.

BYBS: Programming

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I have a love/hate relationship with my job because I work with computers. Specifically I create software – for those of you who aren't familiar with terms like programmer, software development, etc. take a closer look at your web browser. Now imagine something a lot less interesting. That's what I do.

The hate aspect of the relationship is very easy to see: I tend to pull my hair, I run around looking tense, etc. When deadlines roll around I am usually stressed. And when I am tracking down a particularly difficult problem (a "bug" in computerease), I can get downright unsociable, morose and depressed.

But the love aspect is there too. Working in this field often has little rewards that appear as you make progress. Days where you have little victories like that are always very nice. Then there are the times when you do something downright clever. Alright, this doesn't happen very often with me, but every once in a while when it does, it can make your week.

Software is also in a class of activities where the end product is, well, ephemeral. A computer program is like music in this way. You can burn the paper that the music or the program is written on, but that will not destroy the program itself. As one might see similar themes and harmonies in music, there are similar organizations for programs.

Getting even more metaphysical, a program can be said to exist outside time and space: a program is independent of the medium used to display it. If you completely destroy a CD that it lives on, for example, you can get another copy and it will behave more or less the same way.

As a person who tends to be introverted, a sort of ephemeral construct that exists outside of time and space is appealing. I mean…it sounds cool :-)

The icing on the cake has been the berserk, out of control rate that computers and software have been developing for the last 50 years or so. Mind-boggling advances have followed, one after another, to the point where computer animated movies are not only viable, but quite popular. Computers that were once room sized are out-performed by systems that can fit in the palm of your hand.

What this all boils down to is a nice profession that has kept me out of trouble as well as interested for my entire career. The break-neck pace of development has sometimes even made me somewhat well-off, or at least in demand.

If I were a baseball player I might say: "Computers have been vaary, vaary good to me."

Tags: BYBS, Computers, Programming, Ephemeral, Live Girl-on-Girl Action!

BYBS: BYBS :-)

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In the spirit of blogging about everyday things in my life that I am grateful for, I'm glad that BYBS is around. In particular, it gets me to think about something positive, it has enlarged my world and it has given me many things to think about.

As a half-empty kind of guy, it's important for me to remember the positive things in my life. Without this, at times, the negative aspects can encompass my world. BYBS gets me out of this mindset and makes me think about the positive aspects of my life.

One of the hazards of being introverted is that I forget that my view of the world is not the only viewpoint. When I visit other participants I see things through another person's eyes and give myself a chance to look at the world in a different way.

Reading BYBS articles has given me a lot to think about. Thought and ideas are very important to me, but all too often I find the internet a very frustrating place. Too much of it is banal and vacuous, whereas BYBS is a much more thoughtful and interesting part. I've found other people's insights to be very interesting and in some cases profound.

Thus I add Blog Your Blessings Sunday to the list of things that I feel I have been blessed with.

Tags: BYBS, thought, ideas.

P.S. Alright this isn't fair. I posted this one but forgot to reset the date, so it did not show up before the "Nothing" post. I made a point of logging on this morning to post before BYBS and all that. I did. Idid!Idid!Idid! Oh well :-)

Nothing

The strangest part of the whole business was that I didn't feel anything.

Another man walked up and I handed out another tray.

Some of them smiled and said "bless you." Others said "thanks." Most just took the trays without saying anything.

I looked at the stuff we were giving them: a sort of shapeless macaroni in spaghetti sauce with some vegetables. The people at the other tables were serving salad, bananas and cookies.

From time to time, I felt like asking the other volunteers why they were doing this. I wondered why I was doing this.

The company I was working at had a quarterly goal that three quarters of the employees spend 8 hours in some form of community service. If the employees meet that goal, there would be a quarterly bonus – essentially a cash incentive to take part.

Money has never been a good motivator for me. All other things being equal, money is more like a gauge of what people think of me. A bit extra might make more comfortable, but it really would not make a difference in my life.

I would like to think that I'm helping people, but I simply felt like I was handing out trays. As I watched the men eating, I knew that, after this was done, they would be back onto the freezing streets. This was but a short respite for them from the realities of life. Giving them a tray of food wasn't going to change that.

I guess it did give me a little more insight into their situation. At the time all I thought was "I don't know squat." I don't know what it's like to live on the street, I don't know what the freezing cold is like or what these people want. I'm just handing out trays.

There was a woman helping me hand out trays. She asked people how they were doing and the like. The men, for it was mostly men, responded well to her. She was very good about getting the trays to me to hand out to the people in line. In situations where I'm standing right next to a person that's much better than me, I felt useless. Before things had started up, she had mentioned that she was here as part of a church group.

I handed out another tray.

I still didn't know why I was there.

There were all kinds of people in line. There were older ones and younger ones. There were black people and Hispanic people and white people. There was one guy who had a book on computers. One or two skipped the hot portion of the meal and just got the rest.

I had been afraid that things would drag by, but time went pretty quickly. When we were finished we had served over 280 people. The people at the soup kitchen thanked us for helping out. I didn't feel like I had helped anyone.

As I drove back home with my usual lack of directional ability I wondered what I had expected or hoped for. I guess I had expected something: empathy? Understanding? Pity? Self-righteousness? The one thing I hadn't expected was what I felt: nothing.

BYBS: Healthcare

In this context I mean "members of the community helping sick members become well again." While I could spew out that sentence fragment every time I used that concept, or perhaps come up with an acronym (MCHSMBWA), I will use the term healthcare to refer to this. Now then, on with the article…

A great blessing in my life is that, if I become ill, others will help me become well again.

This is a pretty universal concept among human beings, although it takes many forms and different societies place more or less emphasis on it. Regardless, in all societies that I am aware of, if someone gets sick other members of the community will help that person until they get well.

There is a great deal of variation in how this is done. The US uses a mix of private companies (i.e., health insurance) and the government (Medicare, etc.) to administer a hugely complex system. Other countries use a government-oriented approach (socialized medicine).

There is also a great deal of variation in how much time and effort should be spent on healthcare. The US spends over 16% of its GNP on healthcare, whereas in Europe it is more like 10%.

Less developed nations use a much more informal approach: family and friends try to help sick members of the community.

While there is debate about how much time and effort should be put into healthcare, I think that everyone will agree that it is a major part of what it means to be in a community. One of the points of working together is that we are better off than if we did things as individuals.

I myself am a big fan of cooperation and community. I think these things set human beings apart from other living creatures; they make us special.

Tags: healthcare, community, BYB Sunday, BYBS.

Note: I wrote and uploaded this article last week with the idea that, when next Sunday rolls around, I can just publish the article and thereby get it out on time instead of having to write it at the spur of the moment. Please mention in your comment whether you think it is "stale" or at least moreso that my usual stuff.

BYBS: Significant Others

This Sunday for BYBS I'm writing about the blessing of having someone else to share life with: the significant other or SO. Being cagey about sharing personal information over the net, I will refer to my SO as "The One." I thought of referring to her as "TON" for short, but reconsidered.

She laughs at my jokes, puts up with my questionable friends, and reviews the articles that I post here. Her sense of grammar makes her a very good editor, even though I think that the rules of grammar should yield to art, or at least my writing, from time to time.

She is someone I can love and someone who loves me. She is someone to whom I can say "I love you" and who says the same thing to me; and we both mean it. Well, I do, not so sure if you can really mean it wearing shackles, but I digress.

She is also a companion: someone who is there with me each day. When she is with me, I do not feel lonely. She is a companion of choice – not someone who shares an elevator ride with me, but who is there because she wants to be with me. Once again the shackles get in the way of this theory, but still.

And let's not forget housework. I am very grateful for her doing the housework.

For whatever reason, our society is pretty touch-averse. If you went around hugging people during the day you would be considered somewhat strange. Persist and you would be fired. She is someone who I can hug or share a bed with during a cold night without having to spend time in jail afterwards. At least until I'm caught.

Then there's the whole sexual thing, which I will skip. As Roger Zelazny put it, "such things are not of interest to the sophisticated." I happen to disagree, but hey, this isn't a porn or erotica site :-S.

I could go on and on, but I'm pretty lazy, so I'm going to stop here. The One is a great blessing in my life.

Tags: SO, Significant Other, Love, Relationship, BYB Sunday, BYBS

It's not my Fault!

It's not my fault! Copyright (c) Lucasfilm Ltd.

I'd like to point out that I have a very good reason™ for not having posted recently. Mind you I don't actually have a good reason, so this will have to remain in the realm of desire instead of reality.

The sad but honest truth is that I'm lazy and haven't bothered to write anything, which is especially sad since I missed Blog Your Blessings Sunday. Perhaps I'll try one of those "Wednesday is Sunday at blather-n-rants!"

I also want to claim that I caught Shay's flu, which will hereafter be known as "Shay's Plague," but once again that's a lie. However, according to my theory of "lying," I would have to be actively trying to mislead. Seeing as how I just mentioned that it wouldn't be true, trying to mislead would be a pathetic enterprise, so therefore I can say with a clear conscience that "yes, the Shay Plague is responsible for this lack of posts!"

At any rate, here's to more posts and lack of flu!

Tags: flu, Shay, lying. Sources:

• its_not_my_fault is from Star Wars: Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back. That being copyright (c) 1980, 1997, 2004 by Lucasfilm, Ltd.

It Was Nice While it Lasted

The graph of woe

About a month back I noticed something very odd about my site: people were actually reading it.

Or at least that's what my site meter said.

As many* of you have remarked, my site does not display a hit counter. This is largely because the information is so pathetic…er…because I don't want my gawd-like stats to intimidate other would-be bloggers!

At any rate, about a month ago, I noticed a dramatic rise in traffic to my site. Checking my trusty, "100% free" hit counter thingie, much if not all of this was coming from Blog Explosion. This continued for several weeks, over which time I concluded that someone had sneezed on the Blog Explosion accounting screen and thereby given me a whole bunch of free hits.

Then, perhaps a week ago, the traffic subsided. Once again consulting my hit counter, which more often than not says "access denied" these days, the people from Blog Explosion had stopped visiting.

This convinced me of several things:

• I was glad that I had not paid Blog Explosion for this dubious service.
• Very few surfers had ever returned to this realm.
• Never trust strange hit counters.
• Make up numbers.
• There are UFOs.
• No I'm not crazy.
• No really, you are conditioned not to see them.
• Well, I don't know why I can see them but…never mind.

Anyhow, I don't know why BE had decided to send traffic my way, but it was nice while it lasted. But now, however, I'm forced to deal with the grim reality that not a whole lot of people™ read this site. I've gone through that whole song and dance in previous articles, but this did not stop me from calling on an old friend for a boost.

(Me): I need a boost. (The Critic): Then why did you call me? (M): You mean this isn't BE customer support? (TC): If it were I wouldn't have picked up. (M): Good point. Could you give me a boost anyways? (TC): About what? (M): My site. (TC): click. (M): Hello? Hello?!

Thus fortified, I continue to am…therefore I blog. Or something.

Tags: Blog Explosion, crap, lame hit counter, UFO, Live Girl-on-girl Action!, The Critic.

* = actually nobody.

BYBS: Chai

All this and caffeine too!

This Sunday's Blog Your Blessing goes to chai. I've been taking myself a leeetle bit too seriously lately, so I figured I write about one of the simpler things that I'm glad for. Here's also to the friend who introduced chai to me by way of threats until I gave it a try.

I was going to talk about bananas, but the chai got in the way (when you don't watch those things…they move).

Tags: chai, caffeine, byb, bybs, blog your blessings.

Sources:

• The chai may be from Oregon, but the picture is mine :-)

USDA Food Nutrition Information

For those people who think too much about everything and might have been wondering about the nutrient content of various foods, I have discovered a wonderful site. In yet another disturbing display of competence, the US Dept. of Agriculture has an entire database of foods, what types of energy they contain, vitamins, minerals, you name it.

Not only can you download this whole thing as a PDF, you can also download a nifty little program that will look up something for you and display that information. Now mind you, it's not exactly easy to find this little gem in the rough, but it is there:

The main page for the nutrient laboratory: http://www.ars.usda.gov/main/site_main.htm?modecode=12354500

Directly to the nifty software page:

http://www.ars.usda.gov/Services/docs.htm?docid=5720

Tags: USDA, nutritional information, food

Blog Your Blessings Sunday: Caffeine

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed, the hands acquire shaking, the shaking becomes a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

Actually I'm not sure if this should really be a ode to Morning Thunder tea, No-doze or coffee. Whatever you call and however you take it, it boils down to one thing: the toxic substance called caffeine.

Yes, toxic. Plants use caffeine as a natural pesticide to keep bugs and the like off of them. In human beings the oral (as in drinking) LD50 (dosage at which 50% of the recipients would die) is somewhere between 10 and 40g. For the sake of comparison, strychnine, a "very toxic" substance, has an LD50 somewhere between 50 to 160mg – about 1/1000^th of the LD50 for caffeine.

Without this marvelous substance I would not be the jittery, twitching person I am today. I would not have passed as many exams, written required papers, given presentations, performed emergency cleaning, completed projects and generally achieved all that I have.

Yes I owe it all to caffeine, the wonder drug :-)

Tags: Caffeine, coffee, toxicity, Morning Thunder, Nodoze, LD50.

Sources:

• The bit about "It is by caffeine alone…" is attributed to many sources but most agree that it is a parody of the mentat "mantra" used in "Dune" by Frank Herbert.
• http://www.bio.hw.ac.uk/edintox/dose.htm - general toxicology info.
• http://coffeefaq.com/site/node/12 - general info, especially about toxic effects.
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caffeine - general info about caffeine.
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strychnine - for the sake of comparison, here's an article on strychnine, a substance considered to be "very toxic."
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:A_small_cup_of_coffee.JPG – the picture of the small cup of coffee by Julius Schorzman

And Miss Gilligan?!!

I think The Munsters are on after this!

It is a bizarre and disturbing aspect of life that, when I need to do something, worthless drivel that I wouldn't give a second look at becomes interesting. A scene from the movie "Adams Family" sums this up for me. The family has just been evicted from their ancestral home by some rivals and the Adams have been sitting around in a motel for a while.

Gomez, the father, is staring intently at the TV, flipping through channels at a furious pace. Mortica, his wife, has been staring patiently at him for a bit and then says "Why don't we take everyone for a drive?" Gomez looks at her like she's insane and responds "And miss Gilligan?!!"

One comedian put it this way: "When I have to clean up the basement, 'Family Feud'" is interesting by comparison.

Given how much TV I used to watch, it's odd that I don't have one any more. Instead I have the internet, which is somewhat similar. Rather than do anything useful, I can sit around following link after pointless link and learn about useless information.

For example, did you know that if you have two parallel mirrors that some ridiculously small distance apart, that the plates will experience a force between them known as the "Casimir effect?" As it turns out, this force is only interesting to people making incredibly tiny "micro-machines" and the like so this bit of information is almost completely useless. By comparison, Gilligan looks useful.

So now that you're done reading this post, you can do something valuable. Something that will make society better off or at least get the laundry done. Or…you could check out this Gilligan link…

Tags: Gilligan's Island, boredom, casimir effect, procrastination Scources:

• I got the image from http://www.byrum.org/audio/gilligan.gif, though I would imagine it is copyrighted by CBS 1964.

BYB Sunday: More Friends

At the risk of doing another BYBS on friends, recent evens have underscored how lucky I am to have them. This past week I was feeling kind of low for no good reason when a bunch of friends did something that really made me feel good. Given some of the places that I have been over the past year, I realized that things don't have to be this way – I could be in a much colder, less happy place than I am. Here's thanks thank I'm in a better place.

Tags: Friends, BYB, BYBS, BYB Sunday

Why We Don't Need the EV1

A Diesel engine built by MAN AG in 1906

The EV1 was an all-electric car designed to avoid the emissions problems with traditional gas engines. Canuckistani has a good article about it on her web site. This article is partially a response to her post, though it staggers off in its own direction before too long :-)

The problem with the EV1 was simple: it used batteries. Batteries simply cannot store the amounts of energy that are required by cars, therefore the EV1 failed. I think that this, more than anything else, caused it to fail.

While I suppose you can find people who don't mind having to spend 8 hours recharging the EV1's batteries every 100 miles, the fact is that most people would prefer to use a gasoline engine.

Current sales of gas/electric hybrids demonstrate that you can sell a vehicle similar to the EV1. Newer battery technologies like "nickel metal hydride" allow for greater range (150 miles as opposed to 100), but also make them more expensive than straight gas powered cars.

The big problem with things like the EV1 is that they miss the point: we already know how to cause less pollution or to gain better efficiency in transportation; it's just a question of making the required sacrifices.

How can we make a more efficient car? Use a train instead. A train requires roughly 1/3 less fuel than a car because it exploits economies of scale.

How can you get less pollution? Use a renewable fuel like ethanol or biodiesel. Either of these alternatives are much cleaner burning and their production consumes at least as much CO2 as is created by using them.

Things like trains, buses and renewable fuels are not new. Trains predate automobiles, but people switched to cars because they are more convenient.

With a train or a bus you have to wait around for the thing to arrive. If it's raining or snowing that's your problem, and there's not a whole lot you can do about it. With a car, you leave when you want to. If it's raining or snowing, you stay nice and warm.

Housing, stores, health care, etc. all have to be designed around mass transportation. Having a house that is 2 miles from the nearest train station is a major problem. With cars, the layout is much more flexible.

Renewable fuel sources have been with us for quite some time. The original diesel engine, for example, ran on peanut oil instead of a fuel derived from a fossil fuel. Fossil fuels were chosen over renewable fuels because they were cheaper.

Nevertheless, renewable fuels are still in wide use. In order to reduce car emissions during the winter months, about 10% of the fuel used in the US is ethanol. Ethanol is made from plant sources like corn so whatever CO2 a car produces by burning it, will be consumed by the plant making the fuel. The original diesel engine used peanut oil rather than fossil fuels.

So why are fossil fuels used at all? Simple: they are cheaper. It is currently estimated that using mostly ethanol would cost about 20% more than gasoline. In the past the difference was even greater.

More efficient engines or cleaner fuel sources are not the problem. The basic issue is whether or not people are willing to sacrifice convenience and flexibility in order to get less pollution and more efficiency. When ocean levels have risen 10 feet and gas costs $10 a gallon the answer will be "yes." For right now, the answer is "no."

Tags: EV1, renewable energy, alternative fuels, human nature.

Sources:

• Dieselmotor_vs.jpg from wikipedia: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a8/Dieselmotor_vs.jpg
• wikipedia
• Train vs. car efficiency: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuel_efficiency
• EV1: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ev1
• Diesel engine: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diesel_engine
• Fuel efficiency: US Transportation Energy Data Book: http://cta.ornl.gov/data
• Ethanol as a fuel source: http://zfacts.com/p/60.html
• Interesting developments with fuel cells: http://www.acta-nanotech.com/

Is It Just Me?

Is it just me, or could there be something better that we could be doing with our time? Take a look at missile submarine. On the one hand, here is a technological marvel. It can stay submerged for essentially as long as it wants to – the limiting factor is the crew – speed along a pretty fast clip, launch missiles from half way around the world, etc. This vehicle represents decades of development on the parts of thousands of people. On the other hand, a sub like this is insanity incarnate: this is a weapon that if used will kill millions of people and cause the target country to descend into a state of anarchy. These vehicles are hideously expensive. The costs for crew, fuel, support systems, etc. should easily be over a billion dollars a year. Now consider that there are entire fleets of subs like this that a country like the USA maintains. We live in a world where the time, effort and resources could be better spent. Instead of creating weapons to destroy somebody, we could eliminate poverty in this country or at least take a damn good chunk out of it. Research into energy technologies could result in cleaner fuels, or perhaps waste free production. Work in medical technologies could produce cures for diseases that continue to plague the world. There are many, many things that could be done with the time and effort put into supporting a bunch of weapons. The state of the world being what it is, things like missile subs are necessary. There are some pretty crazy people who've been running countries in the past 100 years. People like Kim Jong-ill, Pol Pot and Joseph Stalin. These are people so crazy that it takes a threat of total annihilation to restrain them. But that's just the point: why is it that we have nut-cases like that running countries in the first place? People always have a choice – the generals, soldiers and people do not have to follow orders. People have free will; they can decide not do crazy stuff. So why do we do it? Tags: submarines, insanity, resources, rants. Sources: I got the image of the sub from http://www.navsource.org but, for some reason, it wont let me create a link.

BYB: Writing

Writing is a blessing for me because it's something I enjoy for its own sake. The opinions of others are important to me, but as I talked about in "What's the Blog about, Alfie?", I write mostly because I like to.

Writing is not always easy for me. One story I tell people about is the time that I had to write a report or suchlike for school. I carefully put my keyboard on a desk. I put my desk in the middle of the room. I walked around the desk. For about six hours. That was the point that I realized that, though I might enjoy it, if I had to write to make a living I would starve to death.

And yet, I have come back to writing, particularly fiction, over and over again during my life. I remember writing as a weee lad. I remember writing stories in high school. I didn't write very much in college, though I did some. When I started my "professional life" I wrote a little bit of fiction.

I don't know why it is that I enjoy writing. The grandiose, larger than life images of my imagination look much better inside my head than on the page. But even so, the process of blathering about ideas or writing short stories is enjoyable.

I'd be lying if I said that I don't care what other people think. Recently I felt rather down when a bunch of readers panned a story that I posted on another site. When people compliment me on my stuff I feel good about it. But the overall lack of response to this site (don't get me wrong, I love you guys who come here and read my articles) means that I don't do it simply for attention.

Mysterious and enjoyable, "blessing" seems like an apt way to describe how I feel about writing. The notion of a blessing seems to imply an outside force; that it is something that has been given to you. I like the idea of passing something like that on to someone else.

Of course there are others (The Critic and The Fiend spring to mind) who don't regard my stuff as quite what you would call a blessing. With them in mind I will close with a bit of lyrics from Ricky Nelson:

But it's all right now I learned my lesson well You see you can't please ev'ryone so You got to please yourself

Lyrics from "Garden Party" by Ricky Nelson

Tags: BYB, BYBS, Writing, Fiction

Card Game...of Destiny: Part 2!

An "undersea" city

This posting is intended to be read after

• Krabasis
• Card Game...of Destiny!

It will not make a whole lot of sense if you read it out of context. It will not make a whole lot of sense if you read it in context either, but at least it will won't seem quite as strange.

At any rate, picking up where the last post left off…

(Great Q-Thulu): Not interested. (Boooodah): No way. (Mr. Octopus): You're sick. (Fred D. Krab, Not Yet King of Atlantis): Awww, c'mon! (Great Q): There are some things even I wont do.

Boooodah shudders.

Moe squirts some ink and tries to blend in with the background.

(FDKNYKoA): Oh all right. How about it if I win you make me King of Atlantis?

The others ponder this.

(Great Q): Fine by me. (Moe): This is not a good idea. (B): And no cheating this time? (FDKNYKoA): Cross my shell, bayyyybeeee.

Great Qthulu prepares an Eldar Magic behind his back. Boooodah summons some gawdlike karma. Moe tentacles a few cards.

(Moe): All right, let's play.

A few minutes later.

(B): This…this is impossible! (Great Q, zapping cards repeatedly): Not fair! (Moe): Bogus!

Fred just sits there, puffing on his cigar and grinning like a maniac. After a few more minutes of exclamations...

(Fred D. Krab, Soon to be King of Atlantis): So, bayyyybeeees: you want to make Fred de King…or pay up another way? (Fred waggles his eye-stalks and makes a suggestive klaw gesture). (Great Q): King it is. (B): Word. (Moe): I knew this was a bad idea.

Thus started an event later known as "The Fall of Atlantis," "The Dark Times," or simply "Fred's Reign."

This may be continued in later postings, but enough from Fred for the time being :-)

Tags: Fred D Krab, Great Qthulu, Booodah, Mr. Octopus, Short Story Credits:

• city_reflection was taken by "caterina". I got it here from flickr.

Card Game...of Destiny!

Fred may not have that card but morally, morally he deserves it!

The beginnings of our story, however, take place a few nautical miles away from Atlantis in a shunned and spooky section of the forests where it is said that the Elder Gawds meet to discuss their nefarious plans. One particular dark and stormy night there was a meeting of 3 nefarious…erm….people:

(Great Q-thulu): Got any sevens? (Boooodah): Go fish. (Mr. Octopus): How does this game work again?

At that moment, the flickering light of a torch illuminated a vague and sinister figure in the doorway. This was especially surprising given how hard it is to keep torches lit under water.

(Fred-D-Krab, not yet King of Atlantis): Wey-hey-hey. (GQ): Who the hell are you? (FDKNYKoA): The name is (dramatic pause) Fred. (The thunder rumbles outside).

The three not-exactly elder gawds consider this for a moment.

(B): Piss off. (MO): Go on, beat it!

Fred looks crestfallen (geddit? huh? doya?) and slouches out of the room.

(GQ): That was weird (reaches for the bowl of peanuts).

Pause for a moment to consider them.

Great Q-Thulu is a rather smaller version of the fabled being from HP Lovecraft's works. In this case, "rather smaller" means about 5'6". Unlike his famous brethren, Great Q (as he prefers to be know) does not have wings. He is, however covered in green, slimy skin, with a rather oblong head, clawed hands, and tentacles where one might expect a beard or mustache.

While worshiped as one of the "Great Old Ones," he is always short on followers because he tends to eat them...though he only manages to gnaw on the larger ones.

(B): Wonder what he wanted…

Booodah looks like a fat man wearing a loincloth. His followers say that he is wise and can spread enlightenment. He's actually not that bright, but he does manage to "enlighten" the wallets of those who follow his advice.

While his name may sound familiar to Buddha, a similarity that he will exploit at any opportunity, his "teachings" have about as much to do with inner harmony as a coral reef has to do with a blowfish...hmmm...that wasn't a very good simile.

(MO): What's that smell?

Mr. Oct-o-pus (or "Moe" as his friends call him), is the current prime minister of Atlantis. Like your typical octopus he has 8 legs, suction cups and has a tendency to squirt ink when he feels threatened.

(GQ): Whose deal is it anyways? (FDKNYKoA): What say we try a different card game…any of you guys heard of "poker?"

The other three slowly turn to regard the Krab, who is busy puffing on a foul, seaweed cigar, shuffling cards and grinning insanely.

(Moe): How do you play that?

Several hours later...

(B): HA! Three aces! Read it and weep! (FDKNYKoA): Ah well, I'll have to make do with 5…

Booodah frowns, considering this as Fred rakes in his winnings. Great Q tosses down his cards with a sigh. Moe throws his away with a look of disgust and squirts a bit of ink.

(B): I'm pretty sure there are only 4 aces in the deck. (FDKNYKoA): Yeah, stop cheating!

The other three glare at de Krab as he shuffles the cards again.

(GQ): Well, I'm out of money. (Moe): Me too. (B, under his breath): punk. (FDKNYKoA): Weeeel you know we don't have to play for money, bayyy-beee.

Moe narrows his eyes. Boooodah drums his fingers. Great Q steeples his tentacles.

(GQ): What did you have in mind?

To be continued

Tags: Fred D Krab, Great Qthulu, Boooodah, Mr. Octopus, Silly Story.

Credits, etc.:

• "dogs_playing_poker" is the painting "A Friend in Need" by Cassius Marcellus Coolidge and was obtained from this site.
• Great C'thulu is the product of HP Lovecraft.

Krabasis

The Crab Nebula

Some people have asked what the heck the whole thing with the crab on Canuckistani's nifty certificate signifies. Others (well, actually nobody) have scrutinized the pictured document and noted a rather strange "signature" on it that talks about a certain "Fred D. Krab."

By way of explanation, the whole Krab theme is a reference to a posting I made a week or two back. I (sometimes) try to have a sort of ongoing story in my posts: for example, the struggles of the author to maintain a positive front despite the negative feedback and mounting evidence :-)

At the risk of losing even more readers, here is a bit of introduction:

Do you know what a hero is? It's a person who gets other people killed.

"Serenity"

(Examining some dead bodies) Colon: It could have been worse. Vimes: How's that? Colon: It could have been us.

"Men at Arms" by Terry Pratchett

Every generation faces a challenge.

There are those few who, despite the cost, ignoring the odds, rise to the occasion.

They stand for those who cannot stand for themselves, guarding the weak, freeing the oppressed, they struggle and die for no other reason than because it is the right thing to do.

They are Heros.

And then there is…Fred.

Picture, if you will, a water-covered planet, orbiting a small star in the Crab Nebula. It is home to many water-borne species of intelligent fish, octopi, crabs and other aquatic life. To the inhabitants, the planet is called "Nerts."

The capital city of Nerts is known as Atlantis. It is a beautiful, shining city located in the shallows near some seaweed forests. At noon the sun shines through the water and illuminates its towers and streets with an unearthly glow (appropriate since it's not on Earth).

The city is ruled or perhaps governed by a rather hide-bound group of elected leaders who believe in commerce, regular meals and a vague sort of duty. Made up mostly of octopi (hey, four lobed brains have some advantages), the council overseas (couldn't resist the pun) the operation of the city and trade between neighboring cities. There is even some commerce with some nearby star systems, Atlantis being the cosmopolitan, happinin place that it is.

Despite the more-or-less benign nature of the cities government, there persist certain rumors among the seaweed forests and lilly pads that the King will one day return to reunite the warring tribes and bring an age of peace to Nerts for a thousand years.

Now mind you, some people will believe anything. Furthermore, planet Nerts has enjoyed a basically peaceful and prosperous existence for over 1,000 years.

When faced with this, poets, story tellers others who spend a good deal of time drinking will often times responds with accusations that, when beauty and reality clash, beauty should win, even when it doesn't. Ordering another round of drinks will usually shut them up.

Never the less, the citizens of Atlantis like to tell the story to their children. Mommy Froggies will tell their tadpoles about how they will grow up to become a Princess of the Realm. This can cause a great deal of confusion when the listening tadpole ends up being male.

To be continued...assuming there is any interest...

Tags: Fred the Krab, Atlantis, Nerts, Story

sources/acknowledgments:

• crab_nebula01 is from none other than the Hubble space telescope. I found the image at http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2005-12/eic-mdi112905.php

!Canuckistani!

Saw Canuckistani's comment on friendship and thought...THE HELL YOU SAY! You now, o-fish-ally have at least 1 friend...so there :-)

Friends

Friendship is one of the things that make life worth living, making life a blessing instead of a curse.

Much of the time, the connection between what I do and anything positive in the world is very difficult to discern. I schlep off to work, do a bunch of arcane, weird and specific things, and, if I do it right, nothing exciting happens. When I do things wrong it is very apparent that this is the case, because people run around, scream at me, etc. :-)

With friends, I feel that like there is an immediate and positive contribution to my world. When I see someone smile because they met me, or hear someone's voice pick up because I called, I feel that I've made someone's life just a little bit better. It's a small thing, definitely not life changing, etc. but it's something I can feel good about.

The importance of friends to me, on the other hand is profound. One person noted that I can filter out the positive aspects in life or "steal defeat from the jaws of victory." To have people who seek out my company for no other reason than because they like being around me is a validation that, when I stop to think about it, is very powerful.

It is strange that given how important friends are to me, I sometimes take such things for granted. Like water, air or food, they fade into the background when you have them. It sure is apparent when you don't have them, but when you do, it seems like it's nothing special.

This is, of course, one of the things I like about "Blog Your Blessings Sunday:" that I stop for a second and acknowledge things like this. So here's to friends and friendship.

Tags: BYB, BYBS, Blog your Blessings Sunday, Friends, Friendship.

Gremlins

Muhahaha!

In the type of work that I do, I spend a lot of time trying to figure out why it is that things that should be working, are not working. I also try to figure out why things that shouldn't work, work. Some people point to quantum behavior: the whole idea that things behave differently depending on whether your looking or not.

As a friend of mine says, all other things being equal, the simplest answer is usually the correct answer. Hence my theory: Gremlins.

Note the plural. You never deal with just one gremlin at a time, you deal with a whole pack. That way, one "team member" can distract you, while the rest of them work on screwing you up. In my case, it ran something like this:

(Me): (Types a key triumphantly) Ha! Genius I am! Happy! Happy! Joy! Joy! (Gremlin #1): Way, hey, hey! This guy's gonna be fun! (Gremlin #2): Hey boss! You want us to kill him? (G1): No way! I got plans for this guy. Have George distract him. (G2): You got it.

(With an appropriate sound, I receive an email)

(M): Chips and chocolate? Where?!!!

(I leap out of my chair and run off)

(G1): Hee, hee, hee.

(The gremlins tinker with my computer for several minutes, after which I return).

(Me): Hmph…no chips or chocolate! At least my program works.

(Hits a key)

(Me): What the? But…but…it was just working!

(I start typing madly, Gremlin #1 sniggers. After a few seconds G1 waves a flag at G2)

(Me): Now it's working! I guess that one change fixed everything.

(I lean back languorously watching the results flash by, G1 waves his flag at G2 again)

(Me): WHAT? It stopped again! What's going on here?

(I start typing madly, G1 waves again)

(Me): Now it's working… (G1 waves) …now it's not! But I didn't do anything how (wave) can (wave) this (wave) be (wave, wave) happening?!!

(By now I'm pulling my hair out in bunches and the gremlins are rolling on the floor laughing).

(A tired, dispirited person comes wandering by, I jump up and pull him over to my cube.)

(Me): Sludge! Sludge man, you've seen this before, why isn't this working?

(Sludge looks without interest at my computer and pokes the keyboard a few times. The Gremlin waves his flag)

(Sludge): It's working now. (Me): No it's not, it few seconds it stops working.

(The seconds tick by with no change, Sludge gives me a meaningful look)

(S): I gotta go. (Me): But wait, it's going to happen.

(Sludge plods off, I sigh, the Gremlin waves his flag).

(Me): Gaaaaaaaa! They're in my head! THEY'RE IN MY HEAD!!

Perhaps my explanation is unlikely, but I think aliens would be more interested in blowing up the planet with ray thingies than just messing with me…

Tags: Gremlins, Problems, Troubleshooting, Sludge

Credits:

• The image, "watto.jpg" is from Star Wars: Episode I: The Phantom Menace © 2001 Lucasfilm Ltd.