Thursday, December 06, 2007

DeathTalker 2: Chapter 3

Previous Chapter, Table of Contents, Next Chapter The ship touched down on the dead, windy planet of Korriban; ancient home of the Sith. The setting sun cast long, dark shadows as the ramp was lowered onto the ground. "Welcome to Korriban!" Anakin stopped on the ramp so abruptly and Obi-Wan and Padme bumped into him. He glared at the vision of friendliness and hospitality in front of him. "Who the hell are you?" "I'm Vince Pathway, one of the many friendly people you will find here on Korriban to help make your stay a pleasant one!" Anakin's eyes darted uneasily to the man's lapel, where a garish button proclaimed that the local gift shop was having a sale on stuffed Sith dolls. "Are we on the right planet R2?" "Beep!" "Then where are the Sith?" "Well funny you should ask that – we have an illustrated book in the gift shop that happens to explain, in spooooky detail, the history of the Sith and of Korriban!" Anakin stalked down the runway without another word. He glared at Vince, decked out in cheap, fake black robes and all, and headed for the disturbing looking Evil Sith Temple™ and Gift Shop. Obi-Wan followed at a more leisurely pace, while Padme stopped to ask the man about toy light sabers. Entering the building, the three were confronted with a long line, apparently for tickets to some of the rides. Anakin glanced around in an annoyed fashion and headed towards another fake looking Sith. This one had a button describing discounts at the local restaurant. "Excuse me." "Just a moment friend, let me finish helping this fine fellow!" The man was talking to a large wookie who appeared to have pink bows in his fur. Anakin crossed his arms and waited impatiently. Padme approached with some drinks and handed one to Obi-Wan. "Thanks for thinking of me too." Padme shrugged. Finally the Wookie finished talking to the sales representative. Just as Anakin was about to speak, a Jawa, sporting a fake lightsabre, yanked on the tour guide's pants and started complaining. "Oh my! I'm sorry, I didn't notice that you were first! Just a moment." Gritting his teeth, Anakin made a throwing gesture with his hand. The man and the Jawa glanced at the resulting noise. Anakin made a "shooing" gesture and the Jawa flew backwards, slamming into a wall. The robbed figure turned and did a double-take. "Now where'd he go?" Anakin glared at him. "Well, umm…yes, what can I do for you?" "Where is the tomb of Naga Shadow?" "The wha?" "The tomb of Naga Shadow: the original Sith Lord?!" "I um, um, um…" "Oh that's right here Anakin." He turned and glared at Padme. "How do you know?!" "It's on this map I found while I was getting the drinks." Anakin grabbed the map and stared at it. One corner had the hours that the gift shop was open. "Ummm…we have tours 9 to 7pm most days…" He trailed off helplessly and grinned again. Anakin spun about and marched out of the hall. With a glance at each other, Obi-Wan and Padme followed. "And to our left you can see some ancient Sith hieroglyphs, cursing anyone who is so foolish to enter the tomb of Naga Shadow." The tour guide stuck her flashlight under her chin, the light shining up her nose. Her voice dropped to a whisper. "Do you dare follow me?" A crowd of onlookers watched in more or less rapt attention. Only the sound of someone munching popcorn could be heard. Anakin, Obi-Wan and Padme were to the rear of the group. Anakin had his arms crossed. Padme was wearing a baseball cap. Obi-Wan had a foolish, child-like grin and a T-Shirt that read: "My Jedi Master went to Korriban and all I got was this lousy T-shirt!" "Very well, but don't say I didn't warn you…" The tour guide led the way into the tomb. Anakin, growling, followed the rest. Against the far wall was set a dais, steps leading up to a large throne. On it sat a darkly robed figure, his pale hands protruding from his sleeves. Anakin rolled his eyes. "Enter, my new apprentices…" The crowd shuffled in into the tomb, the dusty floors recording their footprints. Anakin frowned, that voice sounded familiar. "I want to call on you all to join me in the ultimate darkness that lurks at the far side of the force…" Anakin's eyes widened. It couldn't be… "That voice! My god it's…it's…" "Grandpa Sith!" Proclaimed the tour guide. A small Jawa came running up the steps and jumped into the figure's lap. "Oof! Well, we do you want for your birthday little one?" The jawa whispered something jawa-like into the side the of the dark robed The jawa whispered something in jawa-speak into the side of the dark robed figure's head. The sinister figure reached into a nearby sack and pulled out a very fake looking red lightsabre. The little humanoid grabbed the toy excitedly and ran off. Another child ran up and sat in his lap. Anakin's face showed a look of true horror as a flash went off, Palpatine's faced pressed next to the child's. His mouth showing a toothy grin. "This is what we came all this way for?!!" Anakin looked helplessly at Padme. Her hands were on her hips. "But…but…can't you see it's him?! It's Palpatine!" The three of them were now regarding the dark robed figure. "Please…I prefer 'Gandpa Sith'…it's so much nicer." The sinister man was grinning a nasty, Sith-like grin. He put down his latest charge and got up off the throne. "I'm afraid Granpa Sith needs to run off and take care of some evil deeds™. Now you all be bad!" The crowd waved goodbye, except for an especially persistent child. "But I didn't get a chance to talk to him!" Palpatine waved a dark sleeve at him. "This is not the Sith you're looking for." "This is not the Sith I'm looking for." "He can go about his business." "He can go about his business." "Move along!" "Move along!" Palpatine walked through a doorway, down a corridor into an adjoining chamber. "Though I do actually like talking to them, the Force does make things so much easier at times…" Anakin stared him while Obi-Wan took out his lightsabre. Padme's jaw had dropped and she had lost the gum she'd been chewing. "I saw you die…" "Funny, I heard the same thing about you." "Well you will not get away this time." Obi-Wan had taken an "en guard" position and started approaching. Silently, three other robed figures appeared from behind the Sith Lord and took up position behind him. Obi-Wan cocked his head and Padme frowned. "Obi, put the weapon down. You and Padme should leave now." "What just happened? I feel something's changed." "I think you should take his advice master Jedi." Obi-Wan growled and advanced. Palpatine rolled his eyes and shrugged. The Three behind him grinned and raised their hands. With a cackle, purplish lightning flew from their hands to encompass the Jedi Knight. Gasping, he was lifted into the air and hurled against a nearby wall. "I'm outta here!" Palpatine regarded Padme's retreating form. "She always did strike me as fairly bright." "Certainly smarter than Obi-Wan." Palpatine looked at Obi-Wan where he was slouched against a wall, unconscious. "OK, well that's not hard." One of the spectral figures behind Palpatine hissed at him. "Drop your weapons!" "I don't have any." The Sith looked disappointed. "Can I fry him anyways?" "He's already dead idiot." "Speaking of which, how did you manage that?" "Clones, I've got lots of em. Just float over and repossess." "Crap." "So you see how futile resistance is? "Not quite." "And you say you're smarter than Obi-Wan!" "I happened to know where your Gungan Water Polo jersey is." Now it was Palpatine's turn to hiss. The Sith shades looked up hopefully. They had this "Can-I-fry-him-now-pretty-pretty-please?!!" look to their faces. "That wont save you." "What are you going to do? Kill me?" "That raises some interesting metaphysical questions." "Well you have your debating team with you." "But actually I have a better idea" Previous Chapter, Table of Contents, Next Chapter

1 comment:

Whatever said...

I added the new hoitey, toitey feature where next, contents and previous links now appear at the top of each page as well as the bottom. Pretty slick eh?

Alright, actually pretty feeble. It's amazing how annoying it is to add though.